Hineini, Here I am


We can longer continue to live life as we always had. We have to look for new ways to find our way ahead or perish, whether physically or just shut down psychologically. Of course what we are seeing is the result of our cultural inheritance, our thoughts and ideologies we have based our existence on. We followed this path and it has shown us that what we thought was a good idea to base our lives on, was not such a good idea in practice. We have to change our very way of being in this world, the very basis of what we deem important. We can equate the state of the world to being lost.

Imagine that you are lost.

You have tried every way possible but you have to admit to yourself that you are lost. Fear starts in your groin and works its way up to your belly and down to your knees. Your heart races. You want to shout for help. Your body trembles and your head whirls. Your breath grows shallow and rapid. Your heart beats quicker. Now after the panic, you will notice that your skin begins to tingle. You become awake and aware. Your senses grow sharp and clear. The sounds, colours, textures, and edges of things become distinct and radiant. You are fully present, and very much in your body. Now thoughts slow down and become crystalline. What will you do? All of a sudden your world has shrunk; here you are …. You don’t know which way is home. It sinks in that you are really lost. Gradually you become aware that everything you can count on now is right here, and you have no guarantee there will ever again be anything else. You find yourself in a radical place of present-centeredness. You are lost to everything you thought was important, old goals are irrelevant, and yet here you are. – Bill Plotkin

In Exodus 3: Moses comes upon the burning bush.

4 And when the LORD saw that he turned aside to see, God called unto him out of the midst of the bush, and said: ‘Moses, Moses.’ And he said: ‘Here am I.’

5 And He said: ‘Draw not nigh hither; put off thy shoes from off thy feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy ground.’

Hineini is the Hebrew term for “Here am I.” Hineini is for me one of the most beautiful words in existence. Incorporated in its expression is a profound humbleness, an utter nakedness, a sacred silence, a willing surrender. Here I am now as I am. It is a moment of Holiness when we can stand in the true spirit of Hineini, and indeed “the ground is holy ground.” It is in the “radical place of present-centeredness.“ where we encounter the Holiest of Holies – Eheieh Asher Eheieh – I Shall Be That I Shall Be – I Am what I Am, thus our true Self.

This is what these times are bringing us, a time to find our true values, who we really are, naked and devoid of previous agendas,and goals, open to find new ways of being in this world. once we do that we will realise too that all we do and all we think affects not only ourselves, but our whole environment and all it contains, the womb of our existence. When allow the whirlwind of our thoughts and ideas, the earthquake of our actions, the fire of our emotions to subside we can the truly say Heneini Here I am.

In saying “Here I am,” we reveal ourselves. Someone has been calling us and we answer the call. We reveal ourselves, make ourselves present for whomever has been calling us. In saying “here I am, “ we make ourselves available to relate, to interact. Although it is a profound moment of recognizing the Self, you simultaneously recognize the Other. It is as if in revealing yourself you recognize that you are not an insular being but exist solely because you can relate to the Other, the Beloved. Hineini, Here I am so that I may serve you with my talents and abilities. I have certain unique qualities not to get money and power but to use those qualities to serve the womb of my existence, this planet and all that are present in it. To say “Here I am” means that you no longer only belong to yourself, for you are giving the presence of your being to the one whose call you answered.. To truly say Here I am, means saying that I will try with all of being to be present for you. Is this not the true Hieros Gamos? Two separate beings, fully present serving a shared goal? The double edged sword with one point?

It is one of the great mysteries and mystical experiences that in finding yourself you find the Other, the Beloved, at the same time. It is much like during meditation where you focus your intention and instead of arriving at a singular point the whole opens up. We have come from an era where everyone has been trying to find who and what they are, yet the more individualism has been developed the more a sense of isolation has become prevalent in society, and the more the feeling of being lost has become the norm. It is because we have forgotten to say “Hineini, I am.” I am what I am, because you are what you are. I exist only because you exist. If we are looking for a way ahead in these times, we must realize that the Age of Hieros Gamos is dawning. The era that has been, has led us to search for ourselves as separate individuals, a natural stage in our evolution. However, if we want to enter a new stage of our conscious evolution we must turn to each other and say “Heinini, Here I am” Together, without childish insecure egoistic agendas, let us be truly present for each other and see how we can solve these challenges we face now.

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